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Although our journey along the ASD road has been long, full of tight bends, blind summits, the occasion U turn and lots of red lights, our foray into sharing our experiences with others is only a few weeks old (and has been a much smoother ride).

On January 30th when, out of total and utter desperation, my husband and I sat down together (after yet another of our daughter’s meltdowns) and picked a domain name, I could not have imagined that a mere few weeks later, we would find the most incredible group of like-minded parents who knew exactly what we were talking about.

Not only have we found people who also have #ASD or suspected #ASD daughters, but their stories are so uncannily similar to ours; the years of being knocked back, judged, ignored and disagreed with, the nights and nights of coping with a severely unhappy daughter, the struggles, the tears, the desperation (but let’s not forget the joy).

Finally, there is an answer to our desperate castaway cry of ‘Is anybody out there’. The answer is YES and it is a ‘virtual’ yes, an on-line ‘yes’, an easily-accessible ‘yes’. Every single member of our little, private Facebook group is doing what seems to be lacking in the real world – collectively creating a place that freely offers immediate support, advice, encouragement, solace and compassion to parents of high-functioning/Asperger’s/ASD GIRLS in a quick, timely fashion. I am so, so proud that every question asked in the group is thoughtful, every bit of advice is heartfelt and every member responds and communicates in the way that suits them – some actively involved, some simply observing.

Perhaps the most incredible development is that we are bringing our girls together too – helping them to realise they are most definitely not alone. By getting them to share photos, thoughts and ideas (in a closed, secret group run on their parents accounts I hasten to add), they will slowly realise that there are girls out there who want to be their friend, who know how they feel, who share the worry and bewilderment. We are teaching our daughters resilience, we are showing them that if someone tells you something isn’t possible, prove them wrong. Break the mould, stick your head above the parapet, do the unimaginable.

In short, we are all telling our daughters that they are awesome.

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One thought on “Awesome

  • February 24, 2016 at 12:55 pm
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    i stumbled here a few weeks ago, the quest for answers and insight into ASD propels me along many different routes. I am searching for answers, but not as many as i was a year ago.
    i enjoy reading your blog, and it also makes me realise that my food quirks, relationship with sounds, and the world outside are shared in part by your daughter. There are a lot of similarities.
    I think as parents you will quickly realise that understanding ASD is something you will never really come to grips with, but over time you will appreciate that if your aspergers child wants to wear a green jumper every day, have 1 cheese sandwich with half a teaspoon of salad cream on white bread with no butter every lunchtime, and has to sit in a particular seat in the car , then that’s the way it is.
    You will have to get used to your child on the odd occasion telling you they “dont know why” they do certain things, or want or dont want something.
    You will have to learn to have a razor sharp and ultra quick brain as your aspergers child grows up and you will have to be Fox Mulder and Dana Scully and believe the unbelievable.
    Your child will become one day an adult with ASD, and there is a bright future out there.
    My aspergers defines me, it also allows me to do some quite amazing things, solve problems that would tie your brain in knots but i still need a small army of people around me to keep me on track and to keep my aspergers core running cool to prevent meltdowns or shutdowns. I am a big adult, but my friend comes round once a week to make sure my fridge is not full of ice cream and chocolate bars. i need a lot of quiet looking after, my small group of friends do the job of parents and i have had to learn to say when things are not going well.
    All i could really say is that as parents you will find the help of other parents invaluable.

    Sheep are not green for the simple reason that they might accidentally eat each other.

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